Sunday, July 23, 2006 @ 11:57 PM

i hope u will learn to understan me more.. as much as i hope u can open up and allow me to understand u more, rather than repeatedly saying 'u dont understand me.....' ' all my close friends know this.. ...etc'

i wan to see our future.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006 @ 10:51 PM

world war 1 had ended. peace* : ))

@ 10:49 PM

Your Love Style is Agape

You are a caring, kind, and selfless partner.
Unsurprisingly, your love style is the most rare.
You are willing to sacrfice your world for your sweetie.
Except it doesn't really feel like sacrifice to you.
For you, nothing feels better than giving to the one you love.

What's Your Love Style?

Friday, July 14, 2006 @ 12:39 AM

walked passed orc Galleria.. and for a moment, my heart sank. i can almost literally feel it being stabbed and pushed down. tears started flowing while im waiting for the last 105 to go home. i broke my promise to myself. im afraid i may turned into davy jones of pirates of the caribbean and drenched myself in my own curse for eternity.

STOP BEING STUPID

Tuesday, July 11, 2006 @ 4:24 AM

came upon this..

Intimacy is a four syllable word for - Here's my heart and soul, please grind them into hamburger, and enjoy.

At the end of the day faith is a funny thing. It turns up when you don't really expect it. Its like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And its not so important happy ever after, just that its happy right now. See once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you , and once in a while people may even take your breath away.

Sometimes reality has a way of sneaking up and biting us in the ass. And when the dam bursts, all you can do is swim. The world of pretend is a cage, not a cocoon. We can only lie to ourselves for so long. We are tired, we are scared, denying it doesn't change the truth. Sooner or later we have to put aside our denial and face the world. Head on, guns blazing. De Nile. It's not just a river in Egypt, it's a freakin' ocean. So how do you keep from drowning in it?

-Grey's Anatomy

@ 2:38 AM

bumped into kelv on the bus to town. had a small conversation. a pleasant surprise.
met a whole lot of starhub colleagues who i havent meet for months. daniel's bdae ktv session. wad a pleasant session.
ppl are either fatter or thinner. haha. rode in yiting's new car. how i miss those days! when the whole group hanged out til wee hours n dragged ourselves to work the nex day. i even kinda miss the days when we had our conflicts. or the days when we went out of singapore. jb, bangkok, n more jb.
things changed. of cos im not as close to them anymore. but they are people who been thru with me the nasty customers, who see me cry at the smallest things, who gossips about everyone at work, who bring a smile to my face. 3 years.. and i hope our friendship can somehow continue to sail on.. ...

i really do not want to be sad anymore. i want to be the same old bubbly noisy ah lian my friends know me as. i want to learn to bring happiness to myself, before i can give to anyone i love.

i just want to be me.

Monday, July 10, 2006 @ 4:26 PM

hundreds of pubs, thousands of car parks, hundreds of places showing WC and millions of population, i can end up walking infront of him, out of the same car park, and in the pub beside his watching WC.

wth

Sunday, July 09, 2006 @ 4:21 AM

All these while i thought i had learnt a lesson about Cherish. but i think otherwise now.

'i had cherished someone who i know onli for 3 daes, for 3 years.' the exact same words i can remember from my memory.

and now, all i heard is '..only know for less than 6mths, and do not understand each other well.' so much for cherishing. oki fine, i rub in with the 'rush too fast into this rs'. i thought time allows to prove things wrong, but time had make a fool of me again. People taught me to put in effort for what you wan in a rs. but i felt like ive made a total fool of myself in trying to save it.

I drenched myself in unhappiness over his ex's actions. A cool off will be cool, i thought. Giving myself time to get over it and all will be well again aft my stupid phase. I thought cherishing rather than giving up will be good. Instead, im being showed otherwise. Strings are broken almost immediately. somehow my world crumbled.

Instead of cherish, love, im being showed sympathy. I thought somehow or others, things might be fine. in the end, it turned out ive portrayed myself pathetically from my usual tap-running tears and drinking. or so thats how someone made me feel. patching things up just cos not to see me sad.

That instant, it strikes me. my love have been degraded. Love is not charity. it seems ive woken up from another bad bad dream.

Days passed. Life goes on. We dont force Love. for when Love comes and u lose that chance to cherish, u have disappointed Cupid. I had done my part in trying. and the someone who have degraded my love seems more than fine. 'i hate petty people', 'ur low confidence in urself disappointed me', 'huh, why are u stil crying'(why cant i even have the right to feel sad and cry @!$(RY#*$&), 'can u be more responsible and grow up and stop crying' are the last few impacted words curved into my memory. Its funny how human brain always choose to absorb wrong things and missed the nice one.

oh well, just trying to be optimistic, this love loss has its greatness thou. It will revive a years-long cherished friendship between a frog and a mouse.
happy ending.

The starting stability of this rs has caused me to brood too much into the future. and my naivety can never survived in this era.

Have more patience with me friends! i hope to be fine soon too, just buy me more beer! =))

Saturday, July 08, 2006 @ 6:35 AM

waking up in vomit at 6am is nothin. it just means im getting too old for sorrow. everything's gona b alright.
waking up from bad dream and vomit at 6am is nothin. it just mean my mind is old. everything's gona b alright.
waking up from bad dream in tears and vomit is something, at 6am. n now im waiting for my stupid hair to dry from the messy shower. everything's not alright. but i will be fine! i see the sun still shines.. ....

but the stars will stil die..

aye aye.. wake up wake up jammy

Thursday, July 06, 2006 @ 11:34 PM

from todae onward, i will not shed a single tear. i will not feel devastated or pathetic. i will find back myself. no amount of effort is worth it.

@ 6:35 PM

Yes, a heart can hallucinate
If it's completely starved for love
It can even turn monsters
Into angels from above

You forged my love just like a weapon
And turned it against me like a knife
You broke my last heartstring
You opened up my eyes

-Jewel

Dehydration from losing tears, pain from piercing heart. Ive been a fool, and the vicious cycle start all over again.

Monday, July 03, 2006 @ 12:07 AM

iPod Nano slip on leather case for sale at 28 buckz. Market price is 35buckz. Fresh and new for one day onli. Come with free cable grip and free lanyard. Leather case inclusive of screen protection. Please help me ask ard your friends or approach me to buy the product. email me at red_sparklezz@yahoo.com.sg. Pay thru bank transfer and get product thru post or in person, depending on location.

ps: the only defect is that the pakage use to store the casing is being opened at the top. and that is the reason for the price decrease.

Hope to hear from anyone. Will reply email everyday. =))